This is What it Feels Like When Someone Calls You Fat- 1 Year Later

Exactly one year ago, I had a story published on Seventeen.com. One year ago, I came forward with all of the issues that I had been struggling with since I was in the fourth grade. One year ago, I unlocked the chains that had been holding me from my true potential.

My article was a first person narrative detailing my troubles with body issues. In a nutshell, I had been struggling with body issues for a very long time, but when I got to college, I promised myself that I would no longer be held back. That was until a guy on my floor decided to say that, because I was curvy and not a size two, I was not a woman.

This floored me, and looking back now I feel that I had every right to be angry at this guy. His words haunted me and made me into a shell of myself.

With help from a therapist and a fantastic support system, I was able to overcome this incident. I learned that the size of my waist does not determine my compassion, intelligence, or sense of humor. I can be awesome if I were to be a size two or a size twenty; it didn’t matter.

One year later, I wish I could say that I have stuck to my guns with this. But sadly, I do not think my body issues will ever go away. There are days when I feel great and that the world is my oyster. And then there are other days where the last thing I want to do is go outside, because then people will see me and judge me.

I have come very far in the past year. I have accomplished some absolutely incredible things and made some even more incredible friends. I have learned more about myself then I ever thought I could.

Writing my article was the best choice I could have made in regards to the issues I still have with my body. But it has also done so much more than that.

My article has inspired me to launch my own platform where girls can tell their own first person stories about the struggles they have faced. Think Ophelia Speaks or Chicken Soup for the Girl’s Soul, but online. It hasn’t launched yet, but look out for the blog You Are Enough!

I am so happy that my story was published. The feedback I got was so inspiring, that other girls had gone through similar things and that we were able to help each other out with our mutual experiences. I got some hate for my article, but the outpouring of love was so much more than the negativity I experienced.

I will never completely overcome my body issues. But I will get to the point where the two of us can coexist peacefully.

” Being curvy does not make me any less kind, any less creative, or any less funny. It does not mean that I am lazy, it does not mean I am a slob, it does not mean that I am not desirable. It does not make me any less of a woman or a human being for that matter. I am a curvy girl, but that does not mean that I am less.” {Carly Cundiff, Seventeen Article}

http://www.seventeen.com/life/real-girl-stories/a30234/how-i-accepted-being-curvy-doesnt-make-me-less-than/

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Why I Write (and Why You Should Too)

Some people sing. Some people dance. I write.

To be fair, I also sing and dance, even though I am tone deaf and have as much rhythm as a piece of damp plywood.  The point is, even though I am not at all good at singing and dancing, I still do it.

It shocks me when people say that they do not like to write. When I ask them why, most of them say that it’s because they think they aren’t very good at it.

Well I have a voice that could wake the dead, but does that stop me from singing?

The answer to this question is a resounding “no,” much to the delight of my roommates.

Writing is not about creating the next great American novel or the long lost eighth Harry Potter. Writing is about getting emotions and ideas down on paper. It doesn’t have to be good. Hell, it doesn’t have to be spelled correctly or have every period in the right place. There is no need to dot your i’s or cross your t’s. You just need to express yourself in a way that is comfortable to you. Mine is writing.

Writing produces a feeling in me that I assume is the same for professional artists. I feel absolutely invincible when I am writing. I can feel the words flowing from my imagination, down my arm, into my fingers as I write or type the words that are appearing in my head as if by magic. Sometimes what I write is a load of nonsense. The sentences blur into one another in one long, incoherent string of words that, when combined, only succeed in confusing the reader.

Writing doesn’t even have to be read. It can be for your eyes only. I know someone who, once she writes something, burns it if she doesn’t want to keep it. Simply getting the ideas down on paper is enough.

I think one of the reasons that people hate to write is because of school. In school, all we see are word counts and page numbers and formatting necessities. We do our research, write out the bare minimum, and finish it off with a works cited page to show we tried. Somewhere along the line, writing became less about the flow of ideas and more about deadlines.

Writing in it’s truest form doesn’t have word counts or have to be in 12 point Times New Roman. True writing can be on a napkin while waiting for your morning coffee or while sitting on a rock by a hiking trail. True writing happens whenever you feel the pull of words that needs to come out.

We need to get back to the point where people like to write again. In order to do that, we need to be able to write without restraint, imagine without intimidation, and create without criticizing.

writer
And you can be, too.

“There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.”
Ernest Hemingway